Spiritual Solutions

There’s a true story about a little girl called Liz. She had a rare disease and the doctor said she would only have a chance of survival if her little brother, who was five years old, was willing to give his blood for a blood transfusion. He had had the same disease and somehow had managed to overcome it, so his antibodies would be helpful to her in overcoming the disease.

So the doctors approached the little boy, five years old, and asked him if he’d be willing to give his blood for his sister so that she could live. He hesitated for a moment, then he said “Yes, I’d like my sister to live.”

The doctors put them side by side on the bed and started the transfusion. The color gradually came back into the little girl’s cheeks, and the little boy smiled when he saw that.

Then, all of a sudden, the little boy went pale and he looked at the doctor and said, “Will I start to die anytime soon now?”

He had misunderstood; he thought he had to give all of his blood to his sister. But he was willing to give his all because he loved her so much.

How much are we prepared to give in our lives? Just a little bit or all of it?

Here’s the story of a man who expressed this love in a way that turned out to be transformative. He’d been married for nineteen years and his marriage was not going well; he went to his therapist, a man whom he knew called Tom.

He said, “Tom, I want you to help me; I’ve been married for nineteen years and my marriage is really going on the rocks. When we got married, my wife was a beautiful woman, a lovely woman, and she gave herself to me in marvelous ways, and we shared in great ways. 

But then she became really cranky and a kind of a shrew, and all she’s done in the last few years is hurt me as much as she can. I’ve just about had it and I want to do something to hurt her.”

So the man, Tom, said, “Well, Bill, let me think about it for a moment.”

He leaned back and folded his hands, then after a minute or so had passed, which seemed to Bill like an hour, he said, “Bill, you can try this if you want. It’s an idea for you. Today, when you leave here go to the florists; and get a nice big bouquet of flowers to take to your wife.

Then next Tuesday, ask her if she’d like to go out with her friends and tell her you’ll stay at home and look after the kids. And every day, so something really special and tell her how beautiful she is; and for a whole month pay a great deal of attention to her and do lots of things for her all the time.

Then after that month, when you’ve been pouring out all of this love and attention and giving her gifts and so on then leave her; that will really get to her.”

The man said, “Wow, Tom, I’d never have thought of that. That’s great advice, thank you, I’ll do that.” So off he went to the florists.

Tom didn’t see him for several months, and later when he saw him he said, “Oh Bill, how are you doing? Are you having a great time now? You’ve probably left your wife and you have lots of women in your life and you’re having a good time.”

“What do you mean?” responded Bill. “I don’t go out with other women. My wife . . .” Tom said, “Well, you said your wife is a shrew, and cranky.”

“Oh, no,” said Bill, “my wife is a wonderful woman, and I want to thank you for the best advice you ever gave me. I went home and took her flowers, and I paid attention to her.

You know, in the first week she began to change. One day I came home and she was dressed up and looked so beautiful like she always used to; she looked great, and she said, ‘I did it just for you.’

I told her she could go out to dinner with her friends and I’d look after the kids. When she came back she said, ‘Bill, why don’t you take a night out with the boys too. You deserve that and you need it.’”

He said, “Our life is so great now; it’s just like it used to be, only better! And I can’t thank you enough for the advice you gave me.”

So you see how love begins to transform things. When we become the expression of God’s love we begin to change, and as we change then everything around us changes too. This is the power of transformative love.

Remember, God is Blessing You Right Now!

Rev. Alan A. Rowbotham

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Rev. Alan A. Rowbotham, a Unity minister for over thirty-seven years, invites you to subscribe to his free inspirational newsletter, Spiritual Solutions.

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