Spiritual Solutions

Have you ever felt suddenly anxious or “on edge” and didn’t know why?  There are many reasons why we might feel fearful at different times.  We get scared about things like physical danger, accidents, natural disasters, and so on.  These are all situations where fear can be helpful because it triggers the “fight or flight” response, which floods our bodies with adrenaline and prompts us to defend ourselves or flee the danger.

Unfortunately, there are also plenty of other situations where the fight or flight response is unnecessarily triggered and we end up feeling threatened and defensive even when there is nothing harmful about the present moment.

For example, we often fear job interviews, public speaking engagements, social gatherings, sports and other performance activities, doctor and hospital visits, and more.  These situations are not physically threatening yet our bodies often react to them as if they were. 

Have you ever struggled with irrational fears like these?

Even though they may seem irrational, they actually have a simple cause:  your thoughts.  When you are faced with a situation that you feel unprepared to handle, your thoughts begin racing with horrible possibilities. 

Your thoughts in this moment might sound something like this:  “I can’t give a speech in front of people, what if I mess up?  I’m no good at sports; I’ll only embarrass myself if I try to play.  I don’t want to go to the doctor; what if he finds something awful?” 

As these thoughts race through your mind they trigger the fear response and your body begins reacting as if you were in actual physical danger. 

Physical and Emotional Symptoms of Fear

When fear begins infiltrating your body, you will notice some unmistakable signs and symptoms.  These signs include tightening of your muscles, especially in the neck, shoulder and back area; you may also feel a tightening or queasiness in your abdomen; tightness or pressure in the chest, shortness of breath, pounding heart, restlessness, and muscle weakness or shakiness in the arms and legs.

Beyond the physical sensations you may also notice negative emotions like defensiveness, irritability, frustration, anger, aggression, sadness, and helplessness.  Continuously being faced with fearful situations can also lead to more serious physical and emotional problems such as insomnia, depression, appetite changes, weight loss or weight gain, and paranoia.

So, what can you do when you feel overwhelmed by fear?

Positive self-talk is one way to begin shifting your thoughts from fearful to calming.  Rather than worrying about negative things that could happen, you might soothe yourself by saying things like, “There’s nothing to be afraid of; it will all work out fine; I believe I can handle anything; all is well.” 

Even better, intend to do everything you can to encourage a positive outcome for the fearful situation.  You could practice giving a speech repeatedly until you feel more comfortable, or visualize the doctor giving you a clean bill of health.

When you change the thoughts that are triggering your fear response, the fearful feelings subside.

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You might also want to download the new Free ebook – 22 Powerful Tools To Transform Your Fear Into Happiness, Peace and Inspiration. Crammed full of valuable tips, exercises and ideas – it could be the most important ebook you read this year.

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Rev. Alan A. Rowbotham

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Rev. Alan A. Rowbotham, a Unity minister for over thirty-seven years, invites you to subscribe to his free inspirational newsletter, Spiritual Solutions.

Please feel free to publish this article in your blog or newsletter or share it with a friend, as long as you include this resource box.

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By Kathy Gates, professional life coach

A great life doesn’t happen by accident. A great life is the result of allocating your time, energy, thoughts, and hard work towards what you want your life to be.Stop setting yourself up for stress and failure, and start setting up your life to support success and ease.

A great life is the result of using the 24/7 you get in a creative and thoughtful way, instead of just what comes next. Customize these “secrets” to fit your own needs and style, and start creating your own great life today!

1. S – Simplify. A great life is the result of simplifying your life. People often misinterpret what simplify means. It’s not a way to remove work from your life. When you focus on simplifying your life, you free up energy and time for the work that you enjoy and the purpose for which you are here. In order to create a great life, you will have to make room for it in yours first.

2. E – Effort. A great life is the result of your best effort. Creating a great life requires that you make some adjustments. It may mean re-evaluating how you spend your time, or choosing to spend your money in a different way. It may mean looking for new ways to spend your energy that coincide with your definition of a great life. Life will reward your best effort.

3. C – Create Priorities. A great life is the result of creating priorities. It’s easy to spend your days just responding to the next thing that gets your attention, instead of intentionally using the time, energy and money you have in a way that ’s important to you. Focus on removing the obstacles that get in the way of you making sure you are honoring your priorities.

4. R – Reserves. A great life is the result of having reserves – reserves of things, time, space, energy, money, love. Having reserves means that you have a lot more than you need – not 6 months living expenses, but 5 years worth; not 15 minutes of free time, 1 day. Reserves are important because they reduce the fear of consequences, and allow you to make decisions based on what you really want instead of what the fear decides for you.

5. E – Eliminate Distractions. A great life is the result of eliminating distractions. Up to 75% of your mental energy can be tied up in things that are draining and distracting you. Eliminating distractions can be a difficult concept to many people, since they haven’t really considered that there is another way to live. Look around at someone’s life that you admire. What do they do that you would like to incorporate into your own life? Ask them how they did it. Find ways to free up your mental energy for things that are more important to you.

6. T – Thoughts. A great life is the result of controlling your thoughts so that you accept and allow for the possibility that it actually can happen to you! Your belief in the outcome will directly dictate how successful you are. Motivated people have specific goals and look for ways to achieve them. Believing there is a solution to the same old problems you encounter year after year is vitally important to creating a life that you love. Whatever you think and believe, you create. Listen to what you’re telling yourself, and adjust that voice if you need to.

7. S – Start! A great life is the result of starting. There’s the old saying everyone’s familiar with: “A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step.” In order to even move from the couch to the refrigerator, you have to start. There’s no better time to start than today. Don’t wait for a raise, or until the kids get older, or the weather is better. Today, right now, is the right day to start to take a step in the direction of your heart’s desires. It’s what you do TODAY that will make a difference in your life tomorrow.

Resource Information: Life Coach Kathy Gates specializes in helpng people who are ready to create a simpler, less stressful, more joyful and meaningful lifestyle. Visit www.reallifecoach.com to learn more.

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What I am going to ask you to do may seem a little weird for a moment. I want you to listen to your thoughts. Now tell me, what kinds of thoughts fill your head? How would you label them – as positive, or negative?

Now let’s say you are walking down the street with these thoughts. Do you think anyone who would meet you would be able to tell you what’s on your mind?

The answer to the first question is up to you. But the answer to the second question can be pretty generic. Although people will not be able to tell you exactly what you think, they will more or less have an idea of how you are feeling.

Here’s another question. When you enter a party filled with friends, do they all fall silent as if something terrible had happened? Or does everybody there perk up as if waiting for something exciting to happen?

You know what? The answer to all these depends on your frame of mind.

Your thoughts are very powerful. They affect your general attitude. The attitude you carry reflects on your appearance, too – unless, of course, you are a great actor.

And it doesn’t end there. Your attitude can also affect people around you.

The type of attitude you carry depends on you. It can be either positive or negative.

Your positive thoughts have a filling effect. They are admittedly invigorating. Plus, the people around the person carrying positive thoughts are usually energized by this type of attitude.

Negative thoughts on the other hand have a sapping effect on other people. Aside from making you look gloomy and sad, negative thoughts can turn a festive gathering into a funeral wake.

A positive attitude attracts people, while a negative attitude repels them. People tend to shy away from those who carry a negative attitude.

We can also define attitude as the way of looking at the world. If you choose to focus on the negative things in the world, more or less you have a negative attitude brewing up. However, if you choose to focus on the positive things, you are more likely carry a positive attitude.

You have much to gain from a very positive attitude. For one, studies have shown that a positive attitude promotes better health. Those with this kind of attitude also have more friends. Projecting a positive attitude also helps one to handle stress and problems better than those who have a negative attitude.

A positive attitude begins with a healthy self-image. If you will love the way you are and are satisfied, confident, and self-assured, you also make others are around feel the same way.

A negative attitude, on the other hand, has, of course, an opposite effect. So, carrying a negative attitude has a twofold drawback. You feel bad about yourself, and you make others feel the same way.

If you want to have a positive attitude, you have to feature healthy thoughts. This is probably very hard to do nowadays since, all around us, the media feeds us nothing but negative thoughts. A study shows that for every fourteen things a parent says to his or her child, only one is positive. This is truly a saddening thought.

If you want a healthier outlook in life, you need to think happy thoughts, and you have to hear positive things as well. So, what can you do? Well, for starters, you could see a funny movie, you could play with children, spend some time telling jokes with friends. All these activities fill you with positive stimuli, which in turn promotes positive attitude.

Although it is impossible to keep ourselves from the negative things around us, you can still carry a positive attitude by focusing on the good things, the positive things in life.

And this positive attitude you now carry can be of benefit to other people. Sometimes when other people feel down, the thing people mostly do is try to give them advice. But sometimes, all they need is somebody to sit by them, and listen to them. If you have a positive attitude you may be able to cheer them up without even having to say anything.

If positive attitude is really great, why do people choose to adopt a negative attitude instead? One who carries a negative attitude may be actually sending a signal for attention. Before you get me wrong, feeling sad, angry, or gloomy is not wrong itself. But dwelling on these thoughts for far too long is not healthy either. There is a time to mourn.

As always, if you are beset by troubles, even in your darkest hour, focus on the good things in life, you will always have hope. Problems become something you can overcome.

 When you adopt a healthy, positive attitude you don’t have much to lose. Studies show that such an attitude actually retards aging, makes you healthier, helps you develop a better stress coping mechanism, and has a very positive effect on all the people you meet every day. So, what’s not to like about a positive attitude? Adopt one today.

God is Blessing You, Right Now!

Rev. Alan A. Rowbotham

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Rev. Alan A. Rowbotham, a Unity minister for over thirty-seven years, invites you to subscribe to his free inspirational newsletter, “Spiritual Solutions,” at Spiritual Solutions. Feel free to share this article in its entirety with a friend.

If you’d like to receive “Rich Words,” featuring weekday inspirational quotes, you can subscribe at Rich Words.

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 Our thoughts and words are very powerful and go to make up our world reality. Here are some quotes from powerful thinkers to support that idea:

“With our thoughts we make our world” – Gautama the Buddha.

“God’s greatest gift to man is the power of thought, through which he can incorporate into his consciousness the mind of God.” – Charles Fillmore, Keep a True Lent.

“Energy follows thought.” – Annie Besant, Thought Power: Its Control and Culture (1903/1979).

“We become what we behold.” – William Blake.

“Man is a thinking being. The very word ‘man’ comes from an ancient Sanskrit word which literally means ‘to think.’ Through thinking, man has the possibility of knowing God and expressing the wisdom of Divine Mind.” – Eric Butterworth, Discover the Power Within You.

“Man creates his own disharmony”- Hazrat Inyayat Khan.

Let’s have a closer look at some of the words we use and some of the nuances and deeper meanings of them.

When you state something to someone, their first response may be “yes but.” This is their way of negating the opinion or idea that you have expressed. Listen to yourself as you speak. Do you use this phrase? It blocks good communication.

Instead, you can acknowledge what the other person says and state your own opinion by using “yes and.” This will improve the energy of the communication. It acknowledges the person’s point of view as valid for them and secondly it keeps the flow of the conversation in place.

We use disempowering words much of the time. For instance “got to,” “have to” and “must” usually denote a feeling of no choice. Again, listen to your own self talk and the speech of others to get a sense of what is going on at an inner level.

The word “should” is a good one to be aware of, as there is usually some feeling of guilt behind it. Do you ever find yourself saying, “I should go and do so and so”? In back of this is the idea that if I do not I will feel bad.

Then there’s “never,” “forever” and “always.” These come under the heading of gross generalizations. The first thing that can be stated is they are generally “never” true all the time. For example: “She always gets that look on her face when I come home late” and “You never buy me anything nice any more.” These statements reflect the perception of the person generalizing, not the reality of the matter. Again, use awareness with regard to what is going on in any given communication situation.

The word “try” is another interesting little word. You may have seen a demonstration of this when someone is asked to try to pick up a pen. You do not “try” to do something. You either do it or you do not. Another example would be if you ask someone to do something for you and they reply that they “will try” to do whatever it is you have asked. You can be pretty sure with that sort of comeback your request will not be honored.

Watch what words and phrases you use. You will be surprised and delighted at what a difference changing your words can have on your communication with others and your life in general. This really can be quite transformational.

Go ahead and have some fun playing with words. And watch your thoughts behind those words – they are filled with power!

God is Blessing You, Right Now!

Rev. Alan A. Rowbotham
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If you would like to publish this article or forward it to a friend, please include this resource box.

“Spiritual Solutions” is produced by The Rev. Alan A. Rowbotham, a Unity minister for thirty-seven years, and is offered free of charge to anyone who wants to receive it. To be on my newsletter mailing list and have access to other articles, please go to Spiritual Solutions.

To subscribe to weekday inspirational quotes, go to Rich Words.
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